“Sit Down and Shut Up, You Crazy Minorities!”

In our “post-racial/sexist” society, calling people who voice their grievances “crazy,” “entitled,” or “PC” is one of the favorite pastimes of the threatened majority.

Yes, when the “children” get out of line, it’s best to remind them of their place.

“Who do you think you are, demanding to be treated the same as me? We already gave you the vote, what more do you want???”

Oops!I forgot–YOU decide who gets to speaks and who doesn’t. You get to decide whose grievances are legitimate and YOU get to decide what’s good enough for us dregs. I’m sorry.

We’ll go back to sitting quietly and waiting for your permission to speak. We won’t “whine” or “complain” anymore about not making enough money, not being taken seriously or being treated like second-class citizens. IT’S ALL GOOD!

No.

Mental “Health”–What does it look like to YOU?

I posted this on a PTSD support site I belong to and it seemed to resonate with people so I thought I’d post it here as well–

EVERYBODY has “stuff.” Not everybody can see their stuff. Some people see their stuff and try to work through it; other people project all their stuff onto you and try to work through/hammer it out that way.

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My point is, just because you’re in distress, don’t automatically jump to the conclusion that there’s something wrong with you. Just because others seem to be doing better than you, doesn’t mean you’re sick by default. There’s a lot of people who go through life in complete denial, shut down emotionally. Some people just unload all their crap on others.

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Our society encourages people to be emotionally shut down and disconnected, if you’re not, you might suffer. Especially if people use you like their own personal garbage disposal to process all the stuff they don’t want to deal with.

YOU get to define what health, happiness and success look like. If it doesn’t look the same as everybody else’s — forget ’em. I support you, 100% ! It’s all relative! Don’t judge yourself by somebody else’s standards.

Sexism Doesn’t Suck HALF as Much When You’re Medicated!

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“Aah! Thank goodness I don’t have to bother with pesky morning sickness anymore! Now I can get back to doing what I love best–serving an ungrateful husband!”

Ads like these have existed for decades–aimed at women who are conscious enough to know their lives are unsatisfactory but maybe not enough to know why.

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Instead of acknowledging women’s oppression, they tell women that their unhappiness is pathological. The solution? Numb out! Or…..get JACKED! On Ritalin!

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She’s not apathetic because she had dreams of becoming an aviator and got stuck with this instead, she just needs a little PEP! These ads seldom come out and say that women are oppressed but this one gets pretty close–

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And if you’re not saddled with a husband and children…..WHAT’S WRONG WITH YOU???

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There, there, go to sleep now my neurotic, single friend.

“Thank goodness these types of ads are a thing of the past…”   THINK AGAIN!

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Ooh! A free trial offer? Where do I sign up? I feel like I have to be beautiful, successful, caring and polite…it’s like everyone thinks I’m some sort of wind-up doll…

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Oh dear.

Pristiq, clinically proven to treat the depression, anxiety, general malaise and seething rage associated with being a second-class citizen in a society that treats you like a tool.

Shh…this has all been just a bad dream….go back to sleep now.

Entitlement?

Last Thanksgiving I decided to volunteer. It turned out to be a really enjoyable experience but while I was there, one of the diners asked if she might take some food with her when she left; she even brought her own containers. When I asked the coordinator of the event if this was alright, I was surprised by her reply, “She brought her own containers? Ugh, the entitlement.”

Entitled? I’m actually having trouble thinking of what to type because even now I am befuddled by this woman’s reaction. Wasn’t this a charitable event? Wasn’t generosity the spirit of the event? Earlier, she bowed her head during a prayer of supposed gratitude for being able to serve those in need. As I expected, there was more than enough food to take home and it was no problem: but since when was bodily sustenance too much to expect?

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I encountered a similar attitude from my roommate who is letting me stay with him until I get back on my feet. He’s told me on several occasions that his allowing me to stay in his apartment rent-free entitles him to treat me however he pleases and entitles me to NOTHING.This came up because I felt I was being treated poorly in the house and was requesting to be treated with more respect, as an equal. In so many words, he told me that I was being “ungrateful” and that he could kick me out any time. Asking to be treated well? How dare I?! Uncomfortable with the way things are and want them to change? The nerve!!!

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“The whole day?!”

This is not the first time I’ve heard, “After all I’ve done for you!” My abusive mother and ex said the same thing–mostly prompted by my request for better treatment.

NEWSFLASH: THIS IS NOT ENTITLEMENT!

Entitlement is assuming you can do whatever you want and others will just have to be okay with it. It’s assuming you speak for an entire group and not just yourself. Entitlement is assuming that whatever you choose to give is more than enough and if there’s a disparity it’s because the other person is lacking, ungrateful or too demanding.

Wanting and even expecting the basic necessities of life, INCLUDING respect is NOT entitlement. We live in a culture that teaches us nothing is free–not even the food, clothing and shelter we need to survive. And respect? Well THAT has to be earned! The respect that is afforded every human being JUST because they are alive is apparently NOT a given.

No, you must fit the criteria for respect. Optimally, you will be light-skinned, male, a female who panders to males, adult, wealthy, “successful,” conventionally attractive and you will behave in a conventional manner that doesn’t upset any of the elite too much. If you are a female who does not pander to males, dark-skinned, to young or too old or unconventional in any sense, you’ve got to EARN the respect that the first group is ENTITLED TO.

THAT is entitlement. All people deserve respect, NOBODY deserves unquestioning reverence. 

Safe Abortions are a Necessity

My previous post was about movies directed by women and it reminded me that I wanted to share some info from the movie, “Vessel.”

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Vessel is a story about Women on Waves, a group devoted to providing safe abortions to women who don’t have access to them by sailing into international waters to perform them. They also provide women with information in multiple languages on how to obtain safe abortions on their own.

If you follow the link, you can find printable information that you can post in bathrooms, libraries, telephone poles, wherever women and girls will see it! Spread knowledge–knowledge is power!

Female-directed movies on Netflix

You might be surprised at how difficult it is to find movies directed by women. It’s become important to me to support women in getting their stuff out there, thereby increasing demand for art produced by women. So here’s a list of some of the best movies directed by women on Netflix in no particular order.

  1. Hannah Arendt directed by Margarethe von Trotta 
  2. The Girl in the Book directed by Marya Cohn
  3. Adore directed by Anne Fontaine
  4. Angels Crest directed by Gaby Dellal
  5. Mosquita y Mari directed by Aurora Guerrero
  6. When Billie Beat Bobby directed by Jane Anderson 
  7. Vessel directed by Diana Whitten
  8. The Dark Matter of Love directed by Sarah McCarthy
  9. A Path Appears directed by Maro Chermayeff
  10. India’s Daughter directed by Leslee Udwin
  11. A Woman Like Me directed by Elizabeth Giamatti
  12. Water directed by Deepa Mehta
  13. The New Black directed by Yoruba Richen
  14. We Need to Talk About Kevin directed by Lynne Ramsay
  15. Pariah directed by Dee Rees

It was pretty painstaking putting this list together and I will add to it as I find more movies.

P.S. If any of the links are incorrect, please let me know and I’ll fix them. Happy watching!

 

 

Freaks and Weirdos Manifesto Brainstorm

Still a work in progress…

We, The Freaks and Weirdos of this planet, Earth, do hereby decree our unwavering commitment to nonconformity. We establish, herein, that we will henceforth march to the beat of our own drummer, never to be deterred. We hold these truths to be self-evident, that people are people, so why should it be, you and I should get along so awfully? We don’t need NO education to tell us what to wear or who to love!

I have a dream, that one day little short-haired girls will play with little boys in dresses and they will not be ‘confused’ because they know they are loved, not for how they express their gender norms but for all of who they are.

When in the course of human events, it becomes necessary to Fuck The patriarchy and question all the bullshit on which it stands, one nation, under no god(s), undefinable, with respect and dignity for all!

😉

Live Poor, Frugal and Fight the System

The poorer I’ve gotten, the more radical I’ve become. After leaving an abusive relationship, I moved in with an ex who is an ex for good reason but not nearly as bad as the bastard I escaped from. Because of PTSD, I stopped working and in the meantime, my car broke down and most of the people I had come to rely on turned out to be not-so-reliable.

Anyway, I’m on the mend and looking for a job in advocacy but in the meantime, I’ve had to learn to live off of my savings and really stretch my resources. This has been a blessing in disguise. Since I’m anti-capitalism, patriarchy, all that hierarchical, dominance/submission bullshit, I’ve welcomed the opportunity to stick it to the man by getting my needs met for free or little-to-no money.

So here are some cost-saving tips so help you become more self-sufficient, more subversive and less likely to feed the capitalist machine.

Water

Besides being a good way to save water and money during the drought, here are some ways to recycle water and make the most of what you already use.

I hate shortening my showers. It’s the one thing I do for myself that feels luxurious, relaxing and rejuvenating. So, if you like taking long showers, make the most of your time by filling a bucket with the cold water (while your shower heats up) to use to wash your delicates like socks and underwear. In addition to cutting down on your laundry loads, this will help these clothing items last longer.

When you wash your face and brush your teeth, soap up without water. The saliva in your mouth is enough to start a nice foam and as much as I thought it might not work, the skin on my face is actually a lot better since I stopped using water to lather up. I leave it on while I brush my teeth and rinse my mouth and face with cool water at the end. With no water on your face, you don’t have to worry about the face wash getting in your eyes.

Don’t pre-soak your dishes but whenever you need to wash your hands in the kitchen, do it over your dirty dishes and allow the soapy water to flow onto them. You can also pour the water that’s collected in thoroughly soaked dishes and pour it into newly dirtied dishes.

Whenever you’re waiting for water from your faucet to heat up, grab a sponge and use the cool water to clean–this, in turn, cuts down on your overall cleaning and use of harmful chemical cleaners.

Food

Eating what you want to, when you want to or sticking to a diet can be rough when you’re trying to save money or just stop buying so much stuff. I use the Safeway app for money-saving offers and I’ve become quite the chef! Cooking doesn’t have to be a pain. It can actually be a really fun, creative outlet and if you don’t have certain ingredients, start looking for recipes that do without (like eggs and dairy–I’ve made some AMAZING eggless desserts). Also, look for ways to use the million-year old canned food and pasta in the pantry to combine into something delicious. We had tons of unused pasta and I turned it into MANY delicious meals.

FREEZE YOUR FOOD. Meat, bread, rice and sauce freeze really well so if you’re not sure you’re going to eat your leftovers the next night, pop them in the freezer.

SAVE THE REMNANTS! When Christmas rolled around last year, I was fearful it would be miserable because I didn’t have any money. Instead, I got creative. I bought the cheapest ingredients I could find–candy canes, chocolate, sugar and cinnamon–and made peppermint bark and cinnamon sugar almonds. I used the remnants of each of these dishes as toppings for snicker-doodles and brownies.

Clothing

This was actually the most fun thing to lack and need. I already had a sewing machine I’d been dying to learn how to use so I did. I’m still not a pro but instead of buying new pants, I learned to make the old ones fit better. Anything that didn’t fit, I styled into something new and different that did and the only money I spent was on thread and buttons. Also, I did plenty of hand-sewing which can be really relaxing.

Final Thoughts

You can learn how to make the things you need and make use of the things you have. Also, you don’t have to go dumpster diving if it isn’t your thing. You can still find low-cost or no-cost stuff that’s really useful. Instead of looking for the EXACT things you want, look for the key ingredients, the essential qualities that you want and need.

Hopefully this stuff helps you to save money, be more creative and maybe reduce your reliance on consuming mass amounts of unnecessary crap that ultimately feeds the capitalist machine!

P.S. Learn to laugh at yourself when you make mistakes, there’s a HUGE learning curve when trying new things but the mistakes you make while learning can be HILARIOUS.